Someone once said that if all the wealth in the world were to be share equally among all men, such that no one has more than the other, it is just a matter of time, those who use to be rich will become rich again and those who were poor would end up being as poor as they were before the wealth distribution. This opinion may be regarded as quite sweeping to gain general acceptance but the fact remains that success is determined by the person and not the quantum/ size of the resources he has at his disposal.

Perhaps, a more ideal example is that of the average immigrants to the US, most immigrants came into the US with nothing but few luggages containing soon-to-be-discarded personal items but today they have become quite successful and there are many others who have family support and citizen’s privileges yet they have not been able to achieve anything admirable. It is convenient to conclude that you are where you are today because you lack the requisite means to give yourself a better life but that is just a convenient excuse, which can be easily debunked by the stories of other people in your world who had the same limitation yet they succeeded against all odds. What you require to succeed in life has more to do with you and not other factors that are not within your control.

You are the main raw material required to transform your dreams to reality, nothing else counts as much as you. You are the one that must set your goals, you are the one that needs to strategize on how to achieve the goals, you are the one that must be determined to see those goals achieved, you are the one that must work hard and persevere in pursuit of your fulfilment, you are primarily responsible for your success and the rewards and applauds will come to you before anyone else.

If there is anything you must work on to begin to achieve a better result in your career, relationships and life in general, it is not the system, it is not your spouse, it is not your complexion, it is not even your immigrant’s status per se, but your person. The more dedicated you are to getting better as a person, the less frustration you will experience in life. However, if all you ever try to do is to fix things that are not within your control rather than your disposition towards those things, you may be on a long spree of incessant failure, bitterness and frustration.

We will briefly look at some of the things one may need to work on in other to generate better results in life.

Your Thoughts

There is a saying in the traditional African society that you can only tell who a man is truly if you can tell what goes on in his mind, meaning, a man is who he is on the inside. It is scientifically proven that human actions are first conceived through his thoughts and over time his thoughts find expression in his actions. Your mind is where intentions are formed, it is where inventions are birthed, it is where ideas are conceived, and it is where everything that can make or mar your life starts. A man’s mind is the engine room of his person, if the mind is filled with toxic elements like hate, harbouring hurtful experience, negativism, pride, distrust, fear, sadness, hopelessness, repressed anger, lusts, vanities, as it is logically expected, everything he does will reflect those elements. One need to be careful of what he exposes his mind to because it will slip into his thought and will stimulate desires in him and ultimately influence his actions. Human desires are not only rooted in biology, they are a direct product of thoughts that we entertain, the nature of information you consume is bound to reflect in every aspect of your life.

Your Desires

You can only go as far as your desires take you; nature does not force success on someone who has no desire to succeed. If you must succeed at anything in life you must have the desire to succeed, it is the desire that will drive you to do what it takes to succeed. Human desires are fuelled by what he exposes his mind to, his thoughts. If you feed your mind right, you will find yourself desiring the right things. If you feed your mind with nudities, your desire will be to seek them out, all other essential life pursuits become secondary. If you feed your mind with constructive information, you will soon find yourself fashioning your pursuit along the line of such constructive information. I never really thought I could attend a university until I visited one and then the course of my life changed. To develop the right desires, you need to surround yourself with the right stimulants and move into an environment that will challenge you to be better. Your goals in life are founded on the desires of your heart. People become complacent when they have no desire that is strong enough to spur them into action. Everybody wants a better life, but only few have the desire to do what it takes to become a better person. Fuel your desire and the motivation to succeed will naturally come.

Your Preoccupation

The more time you spend in pursuit of your desires/goals, the higher the likelihood that they will be met. Whatever you think about and you allow to form the basis of your desire becomes your pursuits. What you pay attention to will, in due course, draw attention to you. When you doggedly pursue a goal, you will soon become ingenious in your approach and you will start to exhibit skills you never imagined you had.  Focus is a powerful tool for beating failure in life, people who lack sense of focus rarely amount to much in life. Your daily activities should align with your goals. When people complain about not achieving a goal, they often leave out the fact that they allowed distractions in their pursuit of the goal. You cannot spend your day doing nothing and hope that you will gain something at the end of the day. What you do with your time will significantly affect the kind of result you will generate in life. If you want to become a better you, make self improvement your preoccupation and it is just a matter of time, you will find that you have gone beyond your previous limit.

Your Attitude

Life is bound to throw few hard punches at anyone who chooses to break free from limitation. The challenges that we face in life are not necessarily meant to break us but rather to build us up and strengthen our resilience, this kind of philosophy is borne out of a positive attitude to a negative experience. If one sees challenges as an all powerful phenomenon programmed to destroy him and make living a hell, he will throw in the towel too soon and eagerly admit defeat when life springs a negative surprise on him. When things do not turn out as you expected, your disposition will determine whether or not you will ultimately lose the cause or not. If you give up on the war because you just lost a battle, it will be no one’s fault that you end up a prisoner of war. You cannot go far in life if you give up too soon, you cannot go far in your career if you are not humble enough to defer to your superiors and learn from them, you cannot excel in a craft if you are more particular about making money than doing an excellent job, you cannot be happy in your relationship if you are selfish and unwilling to forgive. Life sucks sometimes but it will suck every time if your attitude to life sucks. If you want your life to be happy and peaceful, you have got to have a sense of humour. Staying positive does not mean you have lost touch with reality it is just one fantastic way of surviving a bad situation.

You will also need to work on your human relations, your appearance and most important on your values. These are more will be the target of our discourse in the next issue. Watch out for the concluding part on this page.

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